8 Reasons You Might Be Depressed Because of Love & How To Fix
Remember those Mills and Boons romance novels where being in love seemed like paradise, and “happily, ever after” was what you always dreamed of?
Now, you’re madly in love with the person you’re in a relationship with, and yet, you can’t help but feel that something is missing. S/he is funny, witty, good looking, kind, gentle. But you just can’t be as happy as you’ve always thought you would be.
Wait a minute! Have you ever thought about how you might just be depressed because of love? Could it be that being in love is the reason why your mental health is all over the place? Let’s find out!
1. You’re Still Living In The Past
Often, we may take a longer time to heal from a past relationship than we appear to. You may have concluded that you have nothing to do with your past, but deep down inside, you may still be living with the ghost of your unhappy past relationship. You’re constantly comparing everything to the past, and when things turn out differently, it causes distress.
Stop living in the past – every relationship is unique in its way. Your present love life will take its due course, and nothing from your past will recur if you bury it where it belongs.
2. You’ve Been Single Too Long
You had been happily single, living the best life when suddenly Prince Charming knelt before you in his shining armor. Relax! He isn’t the wrong one, and you don’t have to rid yourself of him. You just have been single for a long time and can’t figure out how to make room for a new person in your life.
With every new relationship comes new responsibilities and newer habits. Don’t freak out, though; take things slow. Make small changes; gradually increase the amount of space and time you dedicate to him/her, instead of doing it all at once. Retain some parts of your single life, so the change doesn’t seem as drastic. Talk to your partner about things you’d like to have your way.
3. You Miss Your Independence
Everything was sweet and delicious at first, but now it’s all weighing down on you. Relax! You may just be depressed because of love as a result of missing your independence and single life.
It would help if you incorporated some “me time” in your life. Do some things alone. Spend some time with friends and family, just like the good old days. Go on a solo vacation. Take yourself out for lunch.
Being in a relationship doesn’t necessarily mean involving your partner in every sphere of your daily life. It is important to reserve some time for yourself, doing things you love.
4. You Want The Relationship To Solve All Your Problems
Many people like to believe that once they find their true love, all their problems will go away. A relationship can never be a panacea for all your troubles and sorrow. While having a trusted and supportive partner helps you cope with many difficulties in life, it won’t magically eliminate your problems. You’ll have to address them and work on them yourself.
5. Your Partner Is Different From You
The saying that opposites attract is fun and adventurous in the early phases of a relationship but as you mature in life, the difference between you and your partner may be difficult to process. It’s only natural for him/her to have a set of likes and dislikes that are different from yours.
You might keep hoping that they will conform to your standards, but the inability to do so will only make you unhappy. The key is to let them pursue their likes and goals. You might also want to be vocal about how you truly feel.
6. You’re Bored From An Uneventful Love Life
Relationships aren’t linear – they have their ups and downs. On some days, you and your partner may feel super romantic and adventurous. Other days, it’s normal to feel dull and monotonous or even depressed because of love. To expect an adventure every single day will only cause you mental anxiety and stress.
Treat each day with your partner as a gift – live the moment, whether it’s fun, sad, or happy, because it’s just a phase. Don’t rely on your partner to spice things up every time, though; plan something yourself as well. Plan an outing, do something unconventional as a team; just step out of your comfort zone.
7. You’re Insecure For Silly Reasons
Being in a relationship may cause you to overthink things that aren’t necessarily true. You suddenly feel too possessive or too protective of your loved one. You constantly live in fear of losing them or being left alone in the end. You don’t want them to stay farther from you, or do anything without you.
You don’t want them to meet or spend too much time with other people. You want to be involved in his/her daily lives more.
These feelings are natural, but these stem from your insecurities, causing you to become depressed because of love. Believe in yourself, believe in your love, and trust your partner. You have chosen each other; your partner still loves you even if he/she isn’t around 24/7.
8. You’ve Finally Found The Right One
You spent a significant part of your life stressing about finding the perfect person, and now that you have him/her, you feel like it’s too good to be true! Yes, you heard me right. S/he is the one, and you don’t have to end it just because it doesn’t feel like it.
Life isn’t a movie. Does it seem too calm and peaceful? The perfect person doesn’t come with songs and trumpets. Sometimes, the right one just fits in your life without you realizing it. Life doesn’t begin and end at finding a partner – there may be other things you can now occupy yourself with.
Being in love is fantastic. It’s easy to fall in love, but it takes a great deal of effort to continue being in love. If unhappy thoughts constantly nag you, you may need to reassess your love life and pinpoint the reasons for your unhappiness. You may just be depressed because of love.
It’s equally likely that your partner may not be the right one; after all, instincts shouldn’t be disregarded. If that is so, waste no time in freeing yourself of the person; you may just be blocking the real happiness from your life by dating the wrong person.